Quarter of life crisis

I am not sure how many times I have tried to write... and not to write about this.

Finally decided to do so. However... the tone in which the writing goes keeps changing according to the moon, stars and PMS...

For the last couple of months, I've been hesitating trying to find out what was my purpose on earth... besides populating the world and earning money. (well money is always part of it).
For some random reason... I was expecting to find the moment that would take me out of the quarter life existencial crisis I was in... that bright start that would hit earth, enter my room and my fairy godmother saying: "welcome to your real life"

It may sound kind of stupid... but I really was expecting the transition stage of life to end... at some point... how? I don't know... I just wanted to have peace of mind once again.

So here I am... no lightning struck... no supernatural signal coming back to earth to tell me the crisis is over... but still... I woke up today and said... cool, let's go to work again... besides... easter week and the beach is only one week away... so what the hell.

There goes my quarter life crisis... until next PMS arrives.

Disclaimer on previous entry

Disclaimer note:

I want to thank Brodie and Oriana (and any other that could have influenced this decision) for the opportunity of chairing AXLDS.
It was definitely tough... and I would never chair again (realized I like faci roles much more!) however I got out of that conference a great deal of lessons in life... which made me realize how happy I am with the current life I have... and how thankful I should be for having this life and the people in it.

Chairing an international conference

I believe my AIESEC life was abruptly ended by some inevitable facts of life.

Still my RAM memory kept sending random messages of "what would have happened if"?
- What would have happened if I applied to AI?
- What would have happened if I applied to a traineeship?
- What would have happened if I lived abroad?
This kind of questions were constantly represented in my subconscience.

almost 2 years after quitting AIESEC... I got offered the opportunity to chair Americas (now SSGN) EXPRO and LDS.
I thought: "wow! my answers prayed, a time to get back all that AIESEC spirit and find my path in life" (I swear I thought that)

I didn't care if I missed 4 important family events... or if those 10 days abroad meant 10 actual vacation days I wouldn't be able to recover. All that mattered was the chance of a lifetime to re-gain the passion for doing something that excited me.

AXLDS came and went off.
And I didn't find a solution to my life.
But I realized... I was so glad AIESEC was over!

Something like: "you want to dance another roll call? during plenaries, breaks, lunch and even during parties?!??" "...jeeze"

The best part of all was on the last party, a random delegate approaches me and says:
- "so... chair... it's our last night at this conference... are you ready to "enjoy" it? I can help you with that if you don't know how to"
- "aaahhhh my young foolish padawan... buy me a beer and go back to play"

Background music:
Barbara Streisand - "Memory all alone in the moonlight... I can smile happy your days..."

It was finally over. Thankfully!